On June 3rd , 1955 , a goodby political party was held in Sweden . It was semisweet , as these variety of affairs always are , and family line pledge and reminisce as usual . However , after everyone shared theirgoodbyesandadjös , this particular get - together became the subject of a classified CIA account .
You see , the soiree was throw for a high - place Soviet functionary at the embassy in Stockholm . Major Vladimir Konobeev , an help to Russian Military and Air Attache Colonel Semen Iouchtchenko , was return to Moscow , and a political party for him was hold in Colonel Iouchtchenko ’s apartment . Various foreign serving employees were pay for to toast Mr. Konobeev . Two American Air Force attache were in attending , and they dish all the gossip to the CIA . Not cool , guys . Ca n’t a few people get together to say adieu to a secure bud without all theda - ra - ma ?
The report , titled"Observations at a Russian Cocktail Party Where Western Service Attaches Were guest , " has since been declassify , and we receive it through the Freedom of Information Act . The war may have been cold , but the gossip was blistering .
There Was a Pretty Low Turnout For the Party. What’s Up With That?
" ostensibly all of the foreign service attaches assign to Sweden were call for ; however , not all attended . This may have been due to another party at the Norwegian Embassy . "
Sounds Like Colonel Iouchtchenko Doesn’t Know How To Let His Hair Down
" The boniface , Colonel Iouchtchenko , seemed to have full program line of the spot . Several times a glance or a nod from him would cause other iron curtain member to move aside from the person to whom they may have been speak . "
- Whip crack . *
Who Are All These Unfamiliar Ladies?
" There were several other women present , presumptively wife of the above officers , but their identity was not determined . "
Mmmmm - hmmmmmmmm .
Konobeev was wearing WHAT?
" Major Konobeev was the only iron curtain attache case in uniform . "
Major Konobeev Has The Most Incredible Nickname
" On one occasion when Major Konobeev had move aside from his situation in the receiving line , one of the Canadian service attache approached him and stated,‘Cornbeef , how is it that you are wear wings?I thought you were a soldier and not a flyer . ' Major Konobeev seemed nervous to break the conversation because he right away moved back to his position in the receiving line of business with the comment that a soldier had to be capable to do anything . "
Cornbeef ! How wonderful is that ? Major Cornbeef ! The Cornbeef - inator ! Cornbeef on Rye , Tarawa-Makin ' copies …
The Interpreter Made a Fool Of Himself
" The interpreter … did not take part in the societal gather but appeared to be standing aside to attend to when needed . He stated … that he was the Russian voice and could speak English and Swedish quite well . He had spoken only a few words when wave away by Colonel Iouchtchenko . He pull up stakes right away and excused himself somewhat abashed . "
Sounds Like Cornbeef Didn’t Approve Of People Getting Down On The Dance Floor
" A British Service attache case , who know Major Konobeev better than most , volunteer the following : Although he and the Dutch Service attache were invite to ( and see ) this political party , neither of their several wives were invited . He felt that the reason , in the case of his married woman , was that she had reminded Major Konobeev of his rudeness at the Service Attache Ball last May 12th ; her cause for doing this was whenMajor Konobeev twice give the axe her dance by promise her Russian officer dancing partner by in the centre of the saltation . "
The Brits can always be bet on for some primo gossip .
Wait, Cornbeef Isn’t Even His Real Name???
" The British trust … that Konobeev is still a full fledged penis of the Red Air Force and a fellow member of the MVD ; also thatKonobeev is not his real name . "
Shut . Up .
Is Cornbeef Actually The Top Dog?
" A reliable Swedish source also volunteered the information that Konobeev was in the Red Air Force during World War II , but as a pilot ; that he was shot down , received frost bite on his hands , that he is still in the Red Air Force in the MVD even though he declares he is in the Red Army . Also , thathe is the Number One man in the Russian Embassyin Stockholm and that Konobeev is not his literal name . "
There ’s more to Cornbeef than meets the eye …
Even If His Name Isn’t Cornbeef, He’s Still a Great Guy
" Major Konobeev has been the most friendly of the Russian and Iron Curtain attache . His knowledge of several language , unobstructed conversation with other westerly attaches , and the fact that the Russian attache envision primed to have a farewell cocktail party for this individual , indicate that Major Konobeev is recognized in his own government , or at least in the Russian Embassy in Stockholm , as one of greater grandness than perhaps his rank or title reveals . "
We ’re gon na miss you , full chum . Next time we ’re in Moscow , we ’ll be sure to give ol’ Cornbeef a mob .
